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I’m not sure how it’s possible, but I don’t remember the precise moment I met Heidi Martinuzzi in person.  I knew of her through her website Pretty-Scary as well as the two amazing reviews she’d written for our films Teenage Bikini Vampire and Confederate Zombie Massacre!, but I don’t quite recall the actual moment of “Heidi, meet Devi. Devi, meet Heidi.”   I suspect there might have been some alcohol involved.   I also seem to recall at some point being in a crowded elevator in which she nonchalantly inquired if I ,too, ever suffer from those pesky oozing sores in my nether-regions.  One is never bored in the company of Heidi, especially not in an elevator packed with unsuspecting strangers.

In fact, one might easily pass her off as but the eternal life of the party.  She’s always surrounded by admirers, wine glass in hand, sharing a round of risque, often self-deprecating jokes that might suggest she is but a lovable drunken ditz.  But don’t be fooled.  Underneath her sexy party girl exterior lies the soul (and brain) of a bookish librarian (okay, a hip, cool librarian perhaps, but still…)   An academic, a writer, a tireless supporter of  women in horror, a promising filmmaker and a fine journalist, Heidi makes a ton of hard work look effortless and fun.  But all work and no play is not her style, so enough of my babbling.  It’s time for some sarcastic quips from Heidi herself…

1.  Please introduce yourself

I’m Heidi! I have known Devi for a few years now and I love her filmmaking style. I’m a journalist and web designer, and I love horror films.

2.  How did we happen to meet?

I thought Devi was an albino* child, until I got up close.  At that point I pocketed the money I had been about to give her out of charity and started sharing obscene jokes with her.

3.  What were you doing then?

I was sadly, doing the same thing I am now only I was younger.

4.  What are you doing now?

Getting my master’s degree so I can share intellectual jokes with Devi, since we ran out of obscenities.

5.  How would you describe your work?

awesome, fun, challenging, unlucrative (is that a word? it is now!)

6.  Who/what are your artistic influences?

Early Riot Grrrl flyers, expressionism, Elvira, Mistress of the Dark

7.  What is your major goal in life?  How are you planning to achieve it?

To control all humanity and bend it to my will; by training apes to do simple household tasks, starting a line of loin-cloth apparel, and creating a cult that revolves around worshipping an ancient atom bomb (still active! be careful!)

8.  What do you think of film festivals – what are the benefits?  Drawbacks?

Film festivals suck because the good ones never let anyone in and they cost too much, and the shitty ones – no one cares about.

9.  What else should people know about you?

I voted no on California prop 8 and think marijuana and prostitution should be legalized in California to save our dwindling state economy

* for the record, we prefer to be called “people of translucence”